Summer Girls And Winter Girls.

There were girls.

Girls in there cherry colored cotton sundresses that smelled sweet.

It was the last of a summer.

I welcome it though, and gladly.

An ending that is bitter sweet.

A goodbye to the blazing gold, and boiling blood red punch colored sunsets.

To welcome my favorite naked trees, exposed for what they really are.

And a hello to the crunch of the corpse of a thousand leaves beneath my boots.

Of crisper air and halloween.

And the summer girls, turn to winter girls with long scarfs and perfect hair.

Deep down though, I'll always miss the summer girls.

Jars

Give me happy and I'll keep it in a jar under my bed and take it out on rainy days, sad days, mad days, whatever.

Happy will glow like the color of fire flies in the summer.

Give me sadness and I'll keep it in a broken jar and it will be blue.

I'll toss the cracked jar in the water, watch it sink, then go up to my room and pull out happy.

I'll put the jar in my bag and take it back and forth.

Then one day I'll go swimming, with the jar of happy in my pocket, and step on shards of sad.

And then I wil grab sad and it's broken jar and swim up with happy in my pocket and sad in my hand.

Go back up to my room, and pull out other jars.

One is red because I got mad at you.

Another is green because I hated you.

This one is white because I don't have anything to say to you.

I like all my jars under my bed.

Even the broken one.

On my birthday, give me another jar of happy and it'll glow like fire flies again and I'll put it under my bed.

Limbo

Waiting in this limbo of clean white sheets.

For you.

Waiting in limbo for your lips on my ivory. My skin.

Waiting to stare in the pools of night sky. Your eyes.

Just... lingering here.

And Fate, draws her weapon, anxiety, and begins to peirce my heart and mind.

But Faith has quicker wings. Faith comes in waves, first lapping lazily around my ankles. Then it sees the attack of Fate, and feels the urgency swell, and Faith takes action.

The lapping becomes waves, soft, but gradually growing. Rising up, consuming me. Water to end the fire of this hell; limbo.

Soon Fate, a sometimes temporary woman, has changed her pace. She lingers in the shadows to remind me she is still there, and she'll never let me forget.

Fate and Faith are the ones that keep my eyes glued to the door. Waiting for the tinker of the hindges, a sign of joy.

An ending to this limbo. One day, you will walk through that door, and my limbo will be no more.

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Hello.

Hello. This is where I work.

There is a desk and a lamp and a computer and a keyboard.

This is where I work.

Gothness Day 2

Day 2 – Share photos and experiences from your Baby Bat days.

Oh God. You want to see what? Really? Honestly? Okay…


Experience: I wanted to be steam and all I got was goggles. I gave my goggles away two years later.

Goth Day 1

Day 1 – How did you come across the subculture?

When I was eleven I heard The Cure’s Just Like Heaven on the radio. So I looked them up. It was love from the moment I saw Robert Smith and his fabulous locks.

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History

I've been waiting about sixteen years to write this post. Here we go.

I was born in 1994 in a hopsital. Hospital is the place where people go to be born, get better, get sick and die. Not all in one day. Well, actually, that can happen in one day... if you let it. That almost happen to me. But I didn't want to go. I had life to do. And so I went.

It's somewhere around 2007. I am twelve. My parents no longer live in the same house and my grandfather is dead, again, in the hospital. This time I am a vistor, not a paient. Although, at the time I wondered if I should be... and my gradad could watch me laying there. But no. He wouldn't want that.

Now it's about 2010. And Teagan, my first real girlfriend/bestfriend now just bestfriend have gone to see Howl. A movie about Allen Ginsburg. I wore a dress shirt and dress pants. I wanted to be a man. We walked up to the girls bathroom because it was empty so we could kiss in front of a mirror just to see what it looked like. Across the street from the theater is where I fell down in the middle of the road and she helped me up. We laughed a lot and we still do. At one point in time when we both smoked we shared the same cigarette and I pretended I was french and I told her sexy things, because she made me feel that way. Then she spent the night at my house and I held her close and she called me Dorian. Because that's what I wanted to be called. Dorian. She was the best girlfriend I ever had.

We broke up. Then together. Then broke up. It's alright. Don't cry.

Now it's 2011 and it's June 9th. School is out and I am done with freshman year. My head's pounding and I feel sick because I tell the older man, older by two years AND going into senior year is a big thing apparently for highschool girls to want... I never understood, that I like him. He laughs for the longest time then admist, taken slightly back that he likes me, too. We're currently in love and I have a date tommorow.

Look outside and you'll see what the sun looks like in 2011. Or the moon. Or the rain. Or whatever.