I woke up. I hurt ALL over. My breathing isn't normal. My hands are all shaky. I am cold and hot at the same time. I look a mess. After awhile it subsides, but always nagging at the back of my brain. I listen to The Horrors. I try and calm myself down... but it isn't working. I look at the clock... it's 3 AM. My head is in a spin as I listen to "Scarlet Fields". What's wrong with me? I just focus on the words and his voice... just forget everything else. Forget the pain. Just focus on his voice. It makes it worse. I can't deal with him! Feeling as if my heart might brake. I turn on "Superstar" by Sonic Youth. I feel myself going into that numbness and I just listen to the words wishing I had a smoke to dull my pain. "Don't you remember you told me you loved me baby? Baby baby baby baby I love you..." Why is everything all fuzzy... like looking threw broken glass? "Loneliness.. such a sad affair.." Oh... I'm crying. Why am I crying? "But you're not really there... it's just the radio.." I sighed. I fell back on my floor whipping unknown tears off my face. "I can hardly wait.. to be with you again..." Why am I listening to this song? It's not helping at all... "Come back to me again... and play your sad guitar..." I don't know. Sometimes you need sad songs. "Baby baby baby baby oh baby... I love you..."
- The Typist.
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